Reddit bad breakup. When things start going well after a breakup I always feel a bit bad, because the benefit typically does not seem mutual. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. I’m 28 and recently went through a tough breakup with my first serious relationship. Each friendship I've been able to look back and think actually how bad it was. Thanks in advance. I love when stories have a happy ending :) Hey Reddit, I wanted to share my experience with a challenging breakup and how I've been navigating through the aftermath. But I guess wanted to take the risk one last time, so to my surprise I found love again and I’m happy and wiser this time. 6K votes, 263 comments. I understand that these things also depend on other factors, such as the duration or seriousness of a relationship. Has it been only one day? Breakups are hard to get over because of the imaginary loss of part of ourselves and our identities. If it’s a mutual breakup - depending on the reason - I do think it can work out if you try again and have grown as people. Do not text, do not call, do not email, don't look at their Instagram! It will only make you feel worse and keep you from 18 votes, 26 comments. In the same boat for the 4th time with my ex. I've come close to breaking up with her a few times but could never push through. We all have our wrong doings. There's a whole process before the break up where you think about how to handle the situation, if it's a good idea to break up, stuff like that. trueOne thing I notice with other 'get ex back' guides is that they offer effectively the exact same advice that is offered on how to find a relationship in the first place, but repackaged to exploit your existing emotions about the person. Talk to us! Why do I feel relieved after my breakup? I'm sad and hurt, yes but also very relieved. I feel those who have successfully gotten back together after a bad breakup and are staying together wouldn’t be on this sub to share it sadly Curious to hear how your break up ended. Break-ups hold so much grief, and this one in particular has held a mirror up to all of my deepest wounds. Any other way is cowardly. 144 votes, 400 comments. Usually, life eventually got better after a breakup. exactly what the title says. It scares me how many people on here are 6+ months post breakup Love (oxytocin) + pleasure (dopamine) + happiness (serotonin) When we break up, our brains lose their regular supply of these neurotransmitters from the relationship, and we go into neurological withdrawal. A support community for those recovering from a breakup with a Fearful or Dismissive Avoidant. As you work to patch yourself back together after a bad breakup, you might wonder, “How long will this last?” Unfortunately, there’s no definitive answer. This is a place where you can ask for advice on many subjects. Yes, it’s difficult. Personally I think it’s no good and self improvement needs to be made also with time to process being away from your ex so your not holding onto lingering feelings. My ex seemed to think that because I move on so quickly after breakups, I've probably never actually loved anyone because no one who is truly in love gets over the end of a relationship that quickly. Honestly it really feels like I'm over it? Am I though? 22 votes, 51 comments. You should always be looking to improve. one thing that helped me through a bad breakup was I stopped listening to all music. You're in good company. The things I used to feel motivated and happy about, it’s like I don’t care about anything anymore and everything feels meaningless to me now. the reason he’s doing that is because all guys just try to forget what happened and act like they’re not hurting and it doesn’t really hit them until months later and that 38 votes, 33 comments. They just ghost you and hit you with the this isn't working. trueJust found my way to this post today- around 1. Fuck you. MembersOnline • lmA0____ ADMIN MOD I have personally but we broke up again in another bad breakup. This journey has taught me a lot about relationships, self-worth, and personal growth. It happened all the time in all of My previous relationships and one that just ended in March with my wife. I really love this… I joined this community 2 years ago after a particularly bad and devastating breakup. I've seen lots of posts asking if avoidants feel guilty for breaking up. I allowed myself to feel all the emotions and didn't supress them, just enjoyed the ride of feeling it all. May 14, 2025 · Recovering from a breakup is a complex process. What caused it, and what did the partner do to you? Was it mutual? Or was it heavily toxic? Want to hear stories!! I had all the right reasons to breakup but I still regret it. Everybody has issues that they run into, and everyone needs advice every now and again. lol I look back and feel so bad for putting him in that awkward situation. Saw a post earlier on this subreddit asking for music that represents how they feel right now. Instead of telling your friends who don’t Hello r/asksf, my fiance (4 year first serious relationship) broke up with me (32M) last month, and honestly I don't know what to do with myself. I have a bad habit of staying in bad relationships too long, but in my experience - once you genuinely stop giving a f*ck and your feelings die. I won't bore you with the details, but I'm going through a break up where I think it's best if we split. This question is for girls only. SO many people act like it's the worst thing to start dating let's say a week after you ended a long relationship, it's not a big deal and if you have an issue with it you should have tried harder to not let your relationship end. Thank you so much for offering such compassionate and insightful guidance on how to navigate through this. Honestly, I've never regretted a friendship breakup. It was all sad songs, from what I saw at least. Everyone does. And then you could’ve worked together with your partner to figure out where things went wrong and how to fix them instead of fighting these feelings of being unsure alone WHILE you’re in a relationship. In general though, I think if a couple breaks up, they break up for a reason and it is exceedingly rare that it will work the second time around. 310 votes, 435 comments. My ex started within a month of our break up so I’m in the process of seeing how immediately dating after a relationship goes. 34 votes, 26 comments. redditmedia. There's another part of me that's worried that I"m just rationalizing my feelings There are billions of advices but I wouldn't go for such a hell of expectations and waiting for who knows how long ever again, it was even worse than a breakup itself. The last one the most, because once you get older you are also thinking about the future together… I would have married this guy. Today I’m going to talk things out with him if there could be any salvation at all and if not well…at least I did my best… My experience, both personal and professional, is that there are some basic and common ways a break up can be handled either good or bad. There was no dramatic end, no argument. Most people we meet are only there for a season. Going through a breakup right now. Look we all do bad things — fuck the people who say we do not deserve forgiveness. It changed me post breakup and most importantly gave me hope. it's okay to breakup with someone and be confident in your decision while simultaneously… 55 votes, 58 comments. What’s the worst way your ex broke up with you? (Right before a major event, wrong timing, etc) Edit: thanks for all the responses. For anyone who went through a breakup with an avoidant, what were they like after the breakup? Break up is bad even if it’s done in person, but when it is done in person it just shows the respect you have for the other person’s emotions. People recover from grief at different paces, for one. It's freeing, in a way, because you don't just break up with someone out of nowhere. Truth is, love plays only a small role in the pain of a breakup. com Personally, I think that “good” breakups are usually caused by issues that can’t be fixed even though both people have tried and still care about each other in some way, so it feels like a loss and an ending. Nov 28, 2023 · Getting over a breakup is rough, but it’s not impossible. If you don't have anyone then try to meet people on this sub. If you were feeling off for a while, then you could have communicated the moment you felt that way instead of choosing to drift apart. I am curious how long it’s been since the break up for you, and if you go to the gym now, do you have a friend you go with or a trainer? Edit 2: general summary (I know there’s more to each point) : 1) Work on self compassion and being comfortable being alone 2) hitting the gym 3) time 4) (for some) medication works Share Add a When people face a breakup situation, they always think that the pain they feel is due to love. Explore advice from therapists on grieving a Hi everyone going through a breakup must read this inspirational post. Seriously, it didn’t help at all. Then I processed everything, made a list of the good and bad of the relationship, it highlighted alot of the red flags and I realised Yea 3 months after break up and a month after my ex had passed I had a random hookup and started crying immediately after in front of the guy. Sep 6, 2024 · Establishing boundaries, limiting contact, muting your ex on social media, and asking for support are some of the things you can do after a breakup. If they hit you with the "maybe we should break up" threat and your response is "yeah, I don't care, bye" that's how you know. I wouldn't wish the pain of heartbreak on anyone, but I So which is harder: breaking up with someone or being broken up with? A force for self-improvement, goodness, and togetherness that helps humanity eliminate evil. This is a subreddit for people who've been through a breakup. The depression felt after getting dumped is as a result of a combination of different reasons (and not just one reason—love, which most people think it is). The best bets for friendship are when it’s truly a mutual fading of romantic interest, or when there has been enough time and Nothing is wrong with it, our relationship is over. Feb 20, 2024 · Breakups are so world-shifting, new research suggests, one might even be in the process of ending things without consciously realizing. I did the begging but got turned down and once I gave up. Nov 9, 2023 · If you find yourself consumed with a variety of emotions following a breakup, you may be wondering how you can move on after your relationship ends. The hardest part is she called us toxic, in reality they are and I've always been a communicator, it's hard when they don't think they need to communicate to you. I'm very sorry for you but in my opinion, the only way for you to work things together is to break up, go no contact and see if BOTH of you want the reconciliation. Don’t jump into a new relationship with someone who thinks that you’re ready for a commitment when you’re not. I’ve done so many things w him, Disneyland, concerts. I was once in your position. Did you ever move or completely change your life after break up? Erm I went on a date like a couple days after the breakup it’s all good just don’t use somebody if you’re not ready to be going out on dates with anyone. People have the tendency to stalk their ex's social media, riding every update like an emotional rodeo My boyfriend is constantly breaking up with me after an argument Has anyone ended a good relationship legitimately to work on yourself? Did you all get back together after some time? In a normal, non-manipulative/abusive relationship, the recipient of the breakup absolutely deserves at least an in-person breakup and the opportunity for a discussion. We were together for almost three years, and while there were great moments, the relationship became emotionally exhausting. I’m worried I made the wrong decision and it wasn’t the relationship, it was me. Maybe if you were in a relationship whr your partner did something terrible like cheat on you or hurt you etc then sending a text is understandable, this wasn’t the case for me. I appreciate you all. I have a very low sex drive in general, so I don’t think this has anything to do with him. This was sober. I made all the mistakes; stay in contact, have sex, try again because you feel you have to, guilt-tripped right back in. If you didn’t provide value, you know what you need to work on. I got dumped in 2021 by the man who I thought I was going to marry. His mom loves me because I am the straight - A girl that straightened out her son. Sometimes you need to give space. This might be the most painful type of breakup I've ever had to experience -- when the other person is truly a wonderful person, and neither of you necessarily www. He also said quite a few things about how I never really get worked up over things in relationships (I'm more of a calm talker), I don't really get jealous or possessive, if he expressed 28 votes, 32 comments. Next thing I know they ghosted me and after multiple attempts to mend the friendship redditmedia. But, I thought I was going to spend my life with him. How many of you guys out there have just as i have, fallen into a depression after breakup? Please share story of falling in love again after a bad breakup/ losing the love of your life. But going through a break up with a long term partner that you deeply love and have an entire life with is absolutely the most full-body, devastating, soul-crushing pain I’ve ever experience. Did anyone else's relationship end because of mental health issues? After our third break up the mess that we were in made her realize that she had to become more self dependant. I didn’t show up for work because of the break up, so they fired me. com Basically made a post about a breakup in another subreddit. What was the point and how do I even know what's real? I didn't even know how to put a title for this. Does anyone have any similar experience? I always thought he was my soul mate and we even did the best we can to part respectfully. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. my ex won’t stop reaching out to me but won’t give me the commitment I need. How do you know when it’s better to break up even if you have a good relationship? (Self growth, might not be able give you what you need, etc) People who suffered severe depression and anxiety following a breakup: how long did it last, and how did you overcome it? Just one of the things I have recently learned about my heartbreak is that, how people treat you when things goes south speaks so much about them. But if there is truly fear of violence or abuse, sure a text or phone call is probably the best way to go. Why is it that relationships that were previously not doing so well improve once there’s a break or breakup and they come back… /r/Relationships is a community built around helping people and the goal of providing a platform for interpersonal relationship advice between redditors. I don’t get it. We purchased a home together and I'm currently living alone until we can either find a tenant or sell. My last breakup was the worst one I've had. But I want to know is if they feel guilty or regret… 73 votes, 169 comments. : r/relationship_advice TOPICS Gaming Sports Business Crypto Television Celebrity Go to relationship_advice r/relationship_advice r/relationship_advice You sounds like such a lovely person for trying to have a good breakup! I'm so sorry you had a recent breakup. Share Add a Comment Sort by: Best You posted something about 20 hours ago saying you have a girlfriend that is disrespectful, dishonest and manipulative and that you're unsure if you should break up or not. Therapy alone will not focus on dealing with your heart ache, but will surely help you become more self aware and grow as an individual. Reply reply charlieclaree • Howwwwww haha I need answers. It seems like most posts on this subreddit are from guys who are suffering the breakup from… Broke up with my girlfriend last week. Feel like a bad person and incredibly guilty. Not really sure breakup is the correct term but it was a very abrupt ending to a 10+ year friendship. Don’t pause your life, but don’t move on too quickly 928 votes, 133 comments. 700 votes, 191 comments. 12 votes, 69 comments. The deficit in these chemicals can make us feel anxious, depressed, and isolated. So why? I was broken up with last night. You may always carry some memory of your Had a bad breakup with boyfriend (21M) a year ago due to his mental health issues and unsurety of his feelings, he came back a year later to show me he realized he had love for me (21F) and wants to stay, only to tell me it's all a lie again. I just would like to know your thoughts and if it is reasonable to break up with your s/o over lack of intimacy in a… I’m not always big on face to face hard conversations and think it’s better to avoid it. What is the worst breakup you have ever had? Going through a rough one so want some perspective. Only time will tell though I guess. All these different reasons come together to form the pain you are feeling What is your best breakup advice to someone who has just been broken up with and who is hurting a lot? We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. My family loves him, my dog loves him, he loves my dog. Messy breakups (or even civil breakups of bad relationships) can sometimes feel like a weight has been lifted because you no longer have to deal with something that wasn’t healthy Talk about the breakup with trusted people, especially people who've been through breakups before will be very helpful. Its devastating . The new person doesn’t deserve to possibly be led on. When we're in a relationship, our whole identity becomes wrapped up with this other person being in our lives. So most of the emotional work is done before the break up. Aug 31, 2024 · Explore toxic relationship breakup Reddit threads for real-life experiences and advice. I think self-doubt is one of the worst experiences as part of a break-up. she knows exatcly the big loss me not having me around Reply reply Exotic A support community for those recovering from a breakup with a Fearful or Dismissive Avoidant. trueIf you’ve ever taken a break in your relationship, what was the aftermath of the break? I’m at a low point in my relationship and I don’t know if I should suggest a break to give each other some time to chill and think or if it’s a situation where if I’m thinking of taking a break I should just bite the bullet and break up. It was messy. [Serious] Redditors who once went through a bad break up and felt as though it was the end of the world and would never find a better person, what advice would you give others today? My friend told me that the reason my ex of two years who was SO in love and infatuated with me after he broke up with me he’s acting like he doesn’t care at all and moving on and just living life and having fun. It’s hard to trust people and relationships after a breakup whether good or bad. Did anyone else realise how bad their ex actually was after breaking up? But he’s going through a hard time and I don’t want to add to his pain so when would be a “right” time to break up with someone? I feel so bad and horrible just thinking of this but if i don’t think of it, my mind tries to convince me to settle that I’ll grow to love him. People romanticize about their relationships after a breakup but sometimes when you think about those things you didn’t like or that didn’t give you happiness it helps with the healing. You have no say in how I choose to move on. There was nothing that either of us did wrong, we are both great people who loved each other deeply. Blindside breakups have to literally be the worst form of breakups, psychologically and emotionally. And the thing that helped me the most was hearing other peoples’ stories of when they went through something similar and made it through to the other side. Alexia5678 Do exes (dumpers) after bad break up come back? 2 1 Share Sort by: Best Add a Comment Nov 28, 2023 · We Asked 13 People What Finally Helped Them Get Over a Bad Breakup Writing down your ex’s biggest red flags can put things in perspective. If you are dumped, I think everyone has their own time period of grieving a relationship, especially if it's one you enjoyed very much. We all mess up we alllll hurt people, people hurt us, we betray people and people betray us and that is nature and you know I’m tired of everyone demonizing this. Can anyone suggest a book to either help me process my emotions or at least distract me? Hopefully something easy to read. Positivity needed. Now you can't function and has already bought a bunch of new stuff for your apartment. I actually tripped a few days after my recent breakup. 110 votes, 97 comments. , do not contact them or stalk them on social media. How do you manage the guilt around leaving a partner who had done nothing wrong, just wasn’t the right fit, despite being genuinely an objectively fantastic human being? Therapy isn’t directed to help you move on from a break up, a good therapist will ideally help you find the root cause of your pain and work towards healing and correcting it. You also might need more time to recover from certain relationships, particularly those that lasted longer or felt more meaningful to you. To all the dumpers here who regretted or still regret the breakup, what made you realize that it was a mistake? 98 votes, 81 comments. And honestly traumatic. When this person let me know they didn't want to be with me anymore, alarms started going off full blast in my head. The breakup itself is another topic, but what genuinely came to me as a surprise is how many people are willing to break up/get broken up with over phone or even by texting. I was in a dark place, complete with the "breakup greatest hits" - sleepless nights, perpetual anxiety, preoccupation with my ex, pleading phone calls and texts to her, mood swings, social media stalking, and generally feeling like I would never recover. I really love this… Then after break up is “confirmed” they again say similar stuff and that it was a fling, they both knew not serious, they had nice breakup and even still are in communication with each other. Reply reply I broke up with my girlfriend today, completely blindsiding her and shattering her heart. Friendships end for a reason, I firmly believe that. Smh I truly don't think they know what it does to the person they end things with. Breakups often happen when there is betrayal, loss of trust and conflict. Sometimes I've had to work on myself after a breakup before I was ready to put myself back out there, other times the next relationship just fell in my lap and it was an awesome If you're finding that your post-breakup blues are interfering with your life, aren't lifting as quickly as bad feelings normally do or you just want to talk it out with an objective third party. It is possible to break up amicably but sometimes, the other person just isn't able. We had some disagreements and arguments about some insignificant conversation over the course of a few days. The best way to get back at someone who left you or betrayed you is not to go find a new partner or to talk badly about them. I've definitely been there, and my worst break-up took more than a year to get over as a result. There have been breakups which improved my life, but they were relationships which hadn’t developed to the point of feeling that they were “the one” just that they potentially could be. I started by trying to do something good for others. also, I didn't want to hear specific songs that made me think of him. By approaching it with a structured, data-driven mindset, leveraging resources like Reddit strategically, and prioritizing self-care, individuals can navigate this challenging period and emerge with greater self-awareness and resilience. hello everyone how did you heal from a relationship? A breakup to be exact dealing with a broken heart is not easy not only… www. Love + contempt = hate. Deep down, you know if you provided value and if there is a reason to wait. Like wtf do you want? Leave me alone and move on. Hang in there OP, you’ll figure out what Here's the best break-up advice that almost no one is capable of following: Cut off all contact. Hit me with your worst! Archived post. While there were so many amazing aspects of the relationship, it just wasn't working anymore at the time. it sounds weird, but music was too emotional (both high and low) and I couldn't handle extreme emotions. I recently experienced a similar situation and ended up breaking up with my boyfriend because the anxiety and doubts got so bad I wasn’t even enjoying the time I spent with him anymore and it was interrupting my day to day life. This is Reddit's very own solution-hub. If you have a crazy or terrible breakup story, let’s hear it! The more My advice, don’t watch breakup coaches, don’t read Reddit. All sources are noted as her friends. Here’s how 13 people moved on from their exes. Healing your mind and heart may take time, though. I've (M24) been in a relationship with this girl for 5 years now. Ever since the 2 year mark, I've felt very unsure about our relationship, I constantly think about breaking up with her. I know I need to break up with him, but I just feel so awful. What should a person focus on doing for further improvements, prosperity and love in his/her life, after a hurting breakup?… Here’s some advice to help get over a bad breakup For background I went through a pretty rough breakup almost 5 years ago and did religiously post and check on this subreddit during that time. Anyone have a success story with breaking up and getting back together? I am 38 years old and currently going through a really bad break up early march of this year. When I listen to sad songs it just makes me feel worse. Even if it’s a fairly amicable breakup, the pain of losing someone you love involuntarily creates grief, which is compounded in their presence. 5 years after my break-up (having a bit of a dip). trueAfter the breakup I went into solitude and doubled down on; •working out (got ridiculously shredded) •started a side business to focus my spare time into (quite successful) •hung out with friends who weren’t apart of worldly culture (drinking, smoking, drugs, partying, alcohol) • DIDNT drink or party • meditated, learnt more about myself •figured out We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. Funny thing is, my ex still reaching out giving me breadcrumbs while still being with the new person. I also learned so much and became a better person. I'm an ex addict, college drop out, complete and utter failure who took her love for granted. We seek posts from users who have specific and personal relationship quandaries that other redditors can help them try to solve. It was amicable. OLD feels so impersonal after feeling so intimately about someone very special to me. I don’t think I ever rationally wanted to break up with her but when things were bad/it was one of those days/we were arguing I definitely felt “this is pointless. 45M subscribers in the AskReddit community. Advice appreciated. Once all of the logistics are sorted, bills are paid, keys are returned, etc. COVID happened, time slipped by and I kept feeling the same way. And the way I define a good break up process is when you can move on fast and the break up will not have a large impact on your future life. It’s hard to let go Reply reply BoundByCarnage • /r/Relationships is a community built around helping people and the goal of providing a platform for interpersonal relationship advice between redditors. That being said, my fiancé and I are one of these rare examples. . Yes. They mention no contact but then prescribe a whole plan of action to 'rebuild attraction" once you've hit some arbitrary milestone. Does anyone else struggle with this? It’s not that I don’t have meaningful things to do or people to connect with, it just all seems so boring and nothing brings me joy. Move the fuck forward. With my last breakup when I was a teenager we were dating for like a year and after the breakup I remember first feeling fine until all of the sudden it hit me and I was completely destroyed for half a year. I'm older and wiser now so I hope it won't be the same. com I don’t know how long ago the breakup occurred but day one of the breakup, I set a reasonable time limit for myself — not to get over the breakup but for a pulse check, in a sense. Then I did a low dose trip to help declutter my mind and help organise my thoughts. So I recently read somewhere the worst type of breakup is the “ending on good terms” breakup because both sides leave with… I’m not trying to have a pity party, but I would love to know if anyone has tips, tales or success stories about finding love after a bad breakup with someone who checked all the right boxes. Archived post. Take some time and be alone or stick to casual relationships. Usually, it's related to how personally they take a breakup and whether they see it as a betrayal or failure. I didn't. I have a friend going through something similar now and am coming to you, reddit, for help. 147 votes, 184 comments. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. : r/love Go to love r/love r/love I completely understand where you’re coming from. Depends on if you're the dumper or not and how long the relationship was. The title explains it all. I broke it up three months ago because I don't want to be with someone who after six long and beautiful years 87 votes, 174 comments. The side initiating the break-up has it easier, for sure, but you kind of have to be a little bit of a sociopath (or the the partner you're breaking up with has to be) to feel nothing when you break up with someone. Discover how others have navigated ending unhealthy partnerships, find support, and learn coping strategies shared by the Reddit community for healing after toxic relationships. She has no desire to get back, I've pleaded multiple times We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. I figured it would resolve it self like it had many times over the years, but that didn’t happen. I had 5 breakups, only 2 of them hurt very bad. He just changed his mind on having kids - I don't want them and he now does. It is what it is, and that's fine. Progression is key, so if you have decided to leave the bad behind, this is the place for you. Being blindsided by a breakup - have they just wanted to do it for a while and not told you And the thing that you mentioned above forgetting about bad things and only remembering about good things, that is a legit phase after break up, trust me, I have gone through this too. It hurt me immensely too, i don’t know why i don’t feel the way i did or what’s wrong or if i can ever be in a stable long term relationship without these feelings of doubt about her, my love for her etc cropping up. I don't really have much friends since I committed most of my time to her/her family. I broke up with an ex via text and had an ex break up with me via text when I gave her the ok because we didn’t live in the same city at the time and I don’t feel bad now having been broken up with that way 3. I still love him too but I also know I deserve better than someone who doesnt love me anymore. My stomach felt like a dark hole and my brain was yelling at me that we were being abandoned by the person we loved the most. qvhqbdtz wfkw rwcr etsvw ihkxtp mzciab mcc jngfx yig fcsymrz